The 3 biggest myths about networking

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🔵 Networking, as great as it is, also gets a bad rep.

“It’s fake”

“It’s transactional”

“It doesn’t work”

These are the 3 biggest myths I hear about networking and to be honest, they CAN be true. Networking CAN be fake, transactional, and not work…if you do it wrong.

But if you network right, it won’t be any of those 3 things.

Instead:

1. it’ll be genuine

2. it’ll be mutually beneficial

3. and it’ll work

Here’s how I approach networking (and how you can too) in a way that debunks its 3 myths.

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🦜 Topic: Debunking the 3 Myths of Networking

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TOPIC
Debunking the 3 Myths of Networking

“It’s Fake”

Some people view networking as fake and it’s easy to see why.

The overly positive demeanors, default smiles, and repetitive small talk can feel like one big act. However, it all comes down to your intention.

It’s like comparing a good salesman to a bad one.

A bad salesman is aggressive and pressures you into buying their product. They don’t care what you have to say or who you are, they just want to make the sell.

But a good salesman? They don’t try to sell to you, instead, they ask you questions to identify your needs and see if their products/services can match your needs.

And if it doesn’t? No harm or foul, they thank you for your time, maybe leave their contact info, then move on.

Good vs bad networking should be viewed in the same way.

Is your intention only to see how this person can help you? Well, then you have the mindset of a bad salesman.

Or do you intend to learn something from them because you’re genuinely curious? If yes, congrats, you’re off on the right path.

Good networking is having a genuine interest in the other person.

“It’s Transactional”

Okay so…it’s true! (Not in the way you’d think though)

Networking is transactional, but here’s the thing, so is practically every other relationship you have.

Your friendships, even your relationships, are transactional. Why? Because they exist based on conditions.

You have friends because they provide emotional benefits, you can laugh with them, and spend time doing fun activities - this goes the same with your relationships.

Yet, I bet you don’t see these bonds as transactional. You don’t right? I’ll tell you why, because in the best friendships, and best relationships, the transaction feels invisible.

Still don’t agree with me? Let’s look at the alternative.

Let’s pretend you have this one friend who never makes plans, who doesn’t text you unless you do first, and who always seems bored when you’re with them.

Would you maintain your relationship with them? Of course not! You’d ditch them because you’re putting in emotional effort for nothing of equivalent in return. 

The same applies to networking, it only feels transactional if the benefits are one-sided.

To avoid this, the key is to see how you can provide value to someone else. In turn, they’ll feel a natural want to return the favor.

This will create a mutual benefit that hides the “transaction” feeling.

“It Doesn’t Work”

This one is more of a complaint than it is a myth, but it happens nonetheless.

First off, if networking isn’t working for you, then I would re-evaluate your approach using the previous 2 points above.

1. Do you have a genuine interest in this person?

2. Are you seeing how you can help them before they help you?

If the answer is no, then you have to change your mindset, otherwise, your conversations will be nothing more than boring small talk.

But here’s one last thing to consider. Are you having fun?

Sounds like a silly question but I’m serious.

The thing is, adults aren’t the only ones that network, children do it too, and they do it best.

They network with the other kids at daycare and the playground. Not because they HAVE to, but because they WANT to.

The point I’m making is that networking is no different than making friends.

It’s a branch of basic social skills.

So don’t feel like you have to network X certain times a week, everyone has different social batteries, do it when you have the energy to.

Closing Thoughts:

1. Have a genuine interest in other people

2. Provide value to others first

3. Learn to enjoy networking

Good networking is having a selfless approach.

See you next Tuesday 🤝

-Michael Ly

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